THE LEFTOVERS

 

The Leftovers

Have you ever met someone

And they say everything just right?

They sweep you off your feet so fast

A real, charming delight!

They look so good on paper

But your gut feeling says it’s wrong.

Twirls you around the dance floor

Always trying to get along.

You know that something’s off

He’s too good to be true.

Interrupts you while you talk

Before you’re even halfway through.

Says that your sweet son

Needs a strong man in his life.

And then casually throws out

A line about becoming his next wife.

I know this cannot be

The only type of man that’s left.

A raving narcissist

That will be leaving us bereft.

I beg you, Fellows and Gentlemen,

If you are there, please step up to the line!

I have an application to give you

Print your name and then please sign.

No, nothing to be worried about,

This is for your peace of mind.

Just wanting to make sure

That we won’t waste each other’s time.

Hey, if you’ve got one, give it here,

I’ll happily fill it out.

No? Then fire away some questions at me

That you want to learn about.

I don’t want sloppy seconds

And please don’t give me the leftovers.

I don’t need a Prince Charming

And I don’t want a man that smolders.

I don’t desire Fred Astaire

Just give me someone real.

Love's reading, writing, cooking

And a hobby is ideal.

And men, are you left wondering

If there’s any good women to date?

Or are they all hiding behind pictures

That AI helped to create?

I promise that they’re out there

Somewhere on the internet.

A good hearted, hardworking

Lady with little to no debt.

I know! Let’s start a new website!

The Mega Hearts Foundation!

Where we can meet amazing people

From all over this great nation!

Wait, you don’t think that you want

A second date again with me?

Thank you so much for saying so!

I appreciate your gentle honesty.

Let’s go our separate ways

And please know I wish you all the best.

I hope we both have luck in love

And that our dates put us to the test.

I know that for the right Woman 

You’ll stand out above the rest!

Let’s both think about it positively

With the hopes it will manifest!

If you show just half of what I’ve seen 

Your humor and your zest,

Then I know you will see great results 

On this crazy love match quest!

Poetry Written By:

Eryn Dunbar